My Naked Boy

Last week I stayed over at friend's place after gaming party. I did not play, but thoroughly consulted a person who was not that much accustomed with Star Craft Brood War game. I was quite afraid that my skills are "rusty" in SC after not playing for years. Fear in minor things is my main obstacle of having genuine fun with people as my latest experience with learning to skate showed.

I have slept for a few hours that night. I had to leave early in the morning to submit my urine for analysis (showed v. high sugar, by the way). Also, a few other people tried to get up at the same time, so my leaving happened to be at the moment of awakeness for at least half of those who stayed over.

One of the boys (geek, Doctor Who fan, considerably crazy, uses Ubuntu, i.e. falling-for-him/constant UST material) slept on the floor naked, under the blanket and everything. But still. He ran in the underwear around the flat a few times after waking up for his Chinese class. In the underwear… I was embarrassed as hell and had to put palm over my eyes and then he came up to say goodbye and hug me. As I had a new handmade brimmed hat with brim falling over my eyes all the time, I could only see a big scar going across his stomach.

My Positive Book

I have this project with putting all positive things like thoughts and memories in one book so I will have it as a guide and reference for how to be happy when I feel sad. And I made a book with a lot of colorful pages. I started filling the book but then I stopped because I don't know what else to write there. Now I worry that I have little fond and happy memories. I worry too much.

My Love Letter

I've sent a love letter to a friend and it was a mistake. But my summertime romance gives me hope and comfort as if I have something good in my life. No that did not come right. The truth is I can't move on. I have feelings for a person I might not see ever again. It makes me cry in the pillow before sleep and despise any possible relationship with anyone else.

I picked up unserious learning of Japanese again. Though I should concentrate more on my thesis and work right now.

I worry about my future. I have contract at work till April. I hope I will get fired but that means I will have less money for the next year. Free summer is tempting, though. And I actually enjoy corporate spirit. I am a loyal person and I love the place where I work.

I don't know what to do with my life. So many options and so little time. And yet I manage to spend days doing nothing. Like today I just was at my parents', chatting, visited my granny and did light grocery shopping for the next week.
And that is all that happened. *sigh*

Tomorrow is dnd, though. So it might be a better day.